Ep. 83 Reset, Reflect, Relax: 2019 Year in Review

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Hanging out in Madison Square Park in NYC earlier this month. Can you tell it was cold!?

Hanging out in Madison Square Park in NYC earlier this month. Can you tell it was cold!?

Happy #SeekTheJoy Tuesday!

. . . AND happy LAST Tuesday of 2019!

What a year! I don't know about you, but I am so ready for a new year, new energy, and a new decade.

This year has brought so many gifts and blessings, but it's also been a bit of a bumpy ride. As someone who loves to make lists, it felt like a no brainer to do a "year in review" episode.

I’m excited to be spending today's episode reflecting on the last year. I share the highs and lows, the podcast's standout moments of 2019, and the lessons, growth, and joy that we've experienced together. It's our 2019 Year in Review - filled with reflections on what it’s meant to show up for ourselves, setting new boundaries, honoring our healing, and what's next for Seek The Joy! 

P.S. after today's episode, we'll be back to kick off 2020 with a fresh new episode on January 28th! I can’t wait!

What a year, what a year!

I’m so grateful for this year. It was filled with many highs, and many lows, but it was a ride worth taking. 2019 challenged me and expanded me. It was - wild, but in the best way possible. In many ways I felt like this year my foot has been permanently on the accelerator. It's felt like my foot has been super glued to the pedal, with no signs of letting up. And don't get me wrong, I am here for this pace and the growth that goes along with it, but at some point it became too much. You’ll hear me talk about this in this week’s new episode. By the time September came around, and I was on my 15th cold of the year (I wish I was kidding), it was time to take a step back and make some changes.

This year taught me about my boundaries, and it’s asked me to redefine my joy, my success, my output, and my bandwidth. Burnout is real, and sometimes it shows up in ways we don’t recognize. More on that to come, soon.

There were SO many highlights this year for Seek The Joy, I don’t even know where to begin. This year I celebrated two years of Seek The Joy Podcast (a milestone I never imagined!) We won Best Podcast at the New Media Film Festival, were a Finalist for the People's Choice Award for the 2019 Discover Pod Awards, and I've had the incredible opportunity to share my journey and the show's story on different platforms and podcasts.

The biggest highlight though has been the constant connection with all of you, and this community that we’re building together.

Sharing some of my favorite pictures and moments from December 2019!

I can’t reflect on 2019 without taking a moment acknowledge and honor 2018. For me, 2018 was the year of deep and honest reflection. It was a year to dive in - to healing, to journaling, to doing the work. By the beginning of 2019, I was still riding that high of learning about me, of getting to know myself in a way I had never done before, but by March - something shifted. It wasn't that I didn't have a desire to do the work anymore, to explore who I am, what I want, and who I want to be. But the ways in which I was willing to do the work changed this year. I knew I needed to take a step back from the depth and intensity, I knew I couldn't and shouldn't go as deep as I was going in 2018. My bandwith couldn't handle it - I had hit maximum capacity. So, that's exactly what I did. I took a break. I stopped going to Kundalini Yoga (mainly because my schedule no longer allowed for it), I stopped journaling and meditating daily, and instead I started journaling and reading a couple times a month on the weekends when I felt inspired.

At first I felt like I was taking a break from my own healing. But now, I realize I wasn't taking a break because we're always healing. Instead, my practice and my growth shifted from doing the work daily because I felt like I had to, to doing the work when I felt energized and inspired.

That choice has been a game changer, and that realization has been deeply healing too. My growth and understanding began to show up in new and different ways this year, and I realized that's okay and that I had to trust it.

This year has set the stage for what’s to come, and for the first time in a while I’m feeling energized and excited about what’s to come. I love being on this ride with you, and I'd love to share with you the top ten things I learned this year. So here we go, but before we dive in I'd love it if you'd join the conversation on our social media channels, send me an email, or leave us a comment on the show notes for this episode and let me know how your 2019 was, what you learned, and what resonated!

2019 - you taught me a lot.

1. Take Care of You - You can't Pour From an Empty Cup

I know this is SO cliche at this point, but this year I really experienced what it means to have an empty cup, to run on empty, and to keep going. I don't want to say I made mistakes this year when it comes to self-care, because I think there's no such thing as a mistake just lessons learned, but I learned a lot about what my self-care looks like, feels like, and where my boundaries are. I'm still figuring it out.

Here's what I know for sure: balance, I don't know if it exists! But what I do know is that it's all about what you put your energy into at any given moment. You can't do it all, and you can't do it all at once, and embracing that truth has been difficult at times, but necessary.

2. Change is Constant

A lot has changed this year, and I know things will continue to change. That doesn't always feel good to me (and I know I'm not alone in that!) I like stability, security, and certainty (I think most people do!) The truth is, life is always in flux. We're always changing, and it can leave you feeling like you're on shaky ground. It's okay to feel uncertainty, it's okay to not feel stable or secure, but at the end of the day it's about knowing change is certain, and trusting that you've got YOU!

3. You'll Learn the Most from the Most Unexpected People and Places

I think I've always known this, but this year especially taught me and showed me that our greatest teachers show up in the most unexpected places, and at the most unexpected times. You never know who you'll meet and what you'll learn from those meetings. It's often the comments and feedback in passing that have had the greatest impact on me this year. Little reminders, encouragement, and ideas have all shown up in ways I never would have imagined.

4. Lead with Kindness

Kindness is totally underrated. I've always seen myself as a kind and generous person, but the stress of this year and the different interactions I had challenged me, and totally tested my patience, which in turn, tested my kindness. I constantly have to remind myself to lead with kindness. You never know who you're talking to, who they know, and who knows them, etc. It's a SMALL world, even when it feels like it isn't, and people are connected in the most bizarre ways. I would never want someone to say I was unkind, rude, or impatient with them because I couldn't compartmentalize or contain my emotions or stress. That's not who I am, and that's not who I want to be either. So, I'm learning to lead with my kindness more, and I probably should add patience to that too.

5. It's Okay to Not Be Okay

I should probably add to that, it's okay to wear your stress on your sleeve. There's a lot happening - ALL the time. My plate is FULL, and for some reason I keep adding to it (I honestly can't help it). When someone asks how I am, I always say "fine" (even when I'm not) and I'm learning it's really okay to wear my stress on my sleeve, and to be honest about how I'm doing.

In a curated world, I've made a really conscious decision to acknowledge how I'm really feeling, and not act like I have it all together - because I don't, and no one does. It's okay to not be okay. It's okay to take a time out from people and life, it's okay to take care of you.

6. Reflect, Reassess, and Let Go of People, Places and Things that No Longer Match Who You Are, and Where You Are In Your Life.

Life comes at you fast, and I'm often living on auto-pilot. Sometimes it feels like a luxury to be able to sit back, reassess, and reflect - but we need to do it, and do more of it.

As we grow and change, as our interests evolve, as our plates get bigger (or smaller) and our load increases, who is in our life is going to change too. I'm learning it's okay to let yourself move on, and move forward, even when it's hard, or uncomfortable.

Here's the thing, there are people we're friends with that come into our lives at different periods. Some are for a season, and others are forever. But when you realize that a friendship is fading, or your interests and priorities have changed and you just don't have anything in common anymore, it's not a great a feeling. You don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but you also need to stay true to you.

I've experienced these feelings more than I wanted to this year. When I started a new position, when my plate got even fuller, it meant I didn't have as much "free" time anymore. My energy was being put into my family, my work, the podcast, and my friendships that have helped me fill my cup. I had to let go of the friendships that were draining me. I had to let go of people who didn't understand or respect the changes that were going on in my life. I'll admit, that was hard - and it challenged me. This year I learned, and I'm still learning, not to hold on too tightly to people who have been part of my past, and expect them to be part of my present or future if it's just not a good fit anymore.

If you made the choice to let go of friendships this year that were no longer filling your love tank (in the words of the iconic Vikki Gunvalson!), know that you're not alone. It doesn't make you a bad person to put yourself, your feelings, your time, and your energy first.

7. Everything is Working Out - Even When You Can't See It or Feel It

This one is tough for me, but boy did I learn this lesson this year. Everything is working out, for your highest good, all the time - especially when we can't see it or feel it.

In moments when I didn't remember this (which were often) I found myself asking these questions: How do I make space for what's happening? How do I allow things to fall into place and TRUST it?

I often default to living in stress and worry. Trust is not my strong suit. A lesson I'm learning recently is that you can create your own security, even when everything around you feels like chaos. You do this by showing up for yourself always, in the good times and the bad. You do this by trusting your judgment, your instincts, and sometimes that means taking a step back so you can better evaluate the situation and circumstance.

8. Honor Where You Are

You're where you are for a reason. Even if it sucks. Even if it doesn't make sense. Even if you're in limbo and it's confusing and making you NERVOUS. It's serving a purpose. Honor it. Honor where you are.

9. Remember Why You Started

This one is HUGE. When you're stressed, when you're worried, when you're confused, it's hard to keep going. It's not always easy to put one foot in front of the other. What's helped me is remembering why I started. To focus on the impact, to focus on the goal, to focus on the purpose. That's not always easy to do, but it's a total game changer when you're able to do it.

If you've fallen off track, if you're questioning whether you're making the right decision, remembering why you started helps you refocus and realign.

10. This is your life, you get to write your story

This is a lesson I definitely learned this year and kept coming back to. When you feel like you’re in chaos, when there’s a lot of change, and growth, it can begin to feel like you’re no longer in control. That things were no longer up to you, that you aren’t the one making the decisions, that your life is in someone else’s hands. That’s not true! This is your life, this is your story, and you get to decide how you feel, react, and be in any given moment.

2020 Here We Come!

There's a lot of pressure at the end of a year to not only reflect, but also to PLAN. It can be seriously exhausting. Here’s the thing though, it's okay to not know what’s next, and not have a plan. But, I've found that it's important to always, always keep dreaming.

I encourage you to spend a little time reflecting on the last year - the lessons, the growth, the opportunities, and also the things that didn't go your way. I've found that it's the stumbling blocks and road bumps that teach us the most.

While I won't be airing any new episodes for the next 4 weeks, there are so many great episodes and conversations to check out, plus don't forget about Joy Corner! It's our interview style blog series, and over 100 interviews have been shared this year, with more to come. If you haven't already, definitely check them out!

I'll still be around, and I’d love it if you’d come hang out with me on Instagram Facebook and Twitter (I'm trying to tweet more!) and let's connect.

Sending you guys a big hug, so much love, and wishing you and your family a very happy and healthy new year!

Talk to you in 2020! xoxx

 

 

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Sydney WeissComment